Dispatch

I received a call on my cell phone today during music history. I checked the number during lunch only to find that I didn’t recognize it. So I decided I’d call them back.

After about twelve seconds, a harsh female voice abruplty interrupted the steady and rhythmic ringing that I had been enjoying.

“Dispatch.”
The voice caught me by surprise, and so I sat still saying nothing.
“Dispatch!”
The voice was harsher this time, and I suddenly remembered why I was calling.
“Um, yeah. Hi! Did someone call this number?”
“Name.”
The person on the other end was quite obviously uninterested in friendly chatter.
“Huh? Oh! Ansen. Ansen Bayer.”
“Hold.”
The line was quiet for almost a full three seconds.
“No.”
“Oh…um…ok, well my phone says someone called.”
“I have no record of it. Could’ve been a misdial.”
“Ok then, thanks!”
“Good day.”

Seriously, who says “good day” anymore? But, as it turns out, this wasn’t the weirdest conversation I had today. That came during study hall later that afternoon.

“Woah, that number is calling me again…I suppose I should answer. Hello?”
“Hello this is 911, is everything ok?”
“Um…yeah, I’m actually doing pretty well.”
“Ok.”
“Ok then.”
“We had you on record as contacting us.”
“Oh really? They said they didn’ t earli…”
“Don’t worry about it. Thanks for your time.”

Pretty crazy eh? I guess 911 just calls random people to check up on them now. Or I accidentally speed dialed (or would it be “sped dialed”?) emergency or something weird.

But I decided that I’m going to call the dispatch once a day and try to think of fun things to say. Like she’ll say “dispatch” and I’ll immediately belt out “THE SECRET WEAPON!!!” or something like that. That’ll teach those 911 punks to prank call poor high school students.

I’m pretty sure it’s supposed to be the other way around anyway…