We are finally settling into our new house. Thank you Jesus!
So moving itself was about as painless as moving can be, thanks to our awesome friends and family (and my packing strategy). Closing was… not. But it did finally happen. The floors didn’t get finished on time and then of course, 3 days after we move in, the garage door breaks. And, to make matters worse, the garage door guy wasn’t quite sure how to fix it, because it wasn’t installed properly to being with and over time broke the door, rendering it completely unusable for a week and a half.
After 3 crazy weeks of living here, we finally closed, have finished floors and a working garage door. We even cleared out the garage and parked our cars in it this weekend.
The biggest blessing was to actually be able to use our house for one of it’s intended purposes (besides living in it), to host people! Saturday night, we had 3 girls and an adult leader of a youth group stay at our house while they were passing through on their way home from a mission trip. Other people from our church hosted other small groups from this same mission team. But it was so exciting to be able to having these girls in our home, give them a comfy place to sleep (not on an air mattress on a gym floor like they had all week), give them a place to shower and just love on them.
This is why we bought this house. To love on people. And God gave us that opportunity within 3 weeks of moving in. I definitely look forward to more of that.
The funny thing about all of this is that I feel like such a faker. I love our new house and I think it’s fantastic. I love it’s space and how nice it looks. I love how many people we can fit in it (and even sleep in it!). But if I step outside of myself, and try to see myself as any random person would, I feel like a poser. The assumptions that I would make about a person who lives in a house like this that looks like this are not always positive.
The assumption of money. Believe me, we both work and on a ministry salaries. We are diligent with our money and blessed not to have had any major catastrophes, but by no means “rich”. The assumption of having it all together. When those girls walk in to my nearly perfectly clean house, that I’ve spent the whole day tidying up, I wonder if they assume I’m some kind of perfect house keeper. Because you should see us on a regular day. The assumption of peace and calm in our house. The kids were already asleep and I had cleared my evening of any goals other than to be with our guests. On any other given day, my to-do list a million miles long, my attitude is anything but peaceful. It felt like the instagram of my life. Just the highlights. They don’t see the grumpy mom who grouches at her kids all morning. Or the messes that I make because I’m too busy to clean them up. Or the fact that I always feel behind. Always.
While that person who greeted those teens and their leader is who I would like to be all of the time, the reality is, I’m just not. With my college students, I strive to be real and authentic. To show them the other side, as ugly and humbling as it may be. To be honest when I’m running behind or struggling to get through. But I also hope that I’m able to clear my plate and focus on them as well from time to time without bringing all of my baggage into the mix. I hope I can be more like the host I was Saturday night and less like the frenetic, stressed crazy person I am on a regular basis.
Maybe with some practice, and a whole lot of Jesus, I can strive toward that.