Random Ramblings (With Abe, Thomas, and Nathan)

February 8, 2005

by — Posted in Ansen Lays it On

Today I have nothing in particular to talk about but plenty of time to say it. So I think I’ll just start writing and see where I take me.

It snowed alot today. I’m sure you probably didn’t have to read this to figure that out. So in celebration of that fact (and the fact that it took me 50 minutes to get home from school – darn people getting stuck at intersections…) it is now snowing on my blog. However, I don’t want to cause any traffic accidents so it’s just some flurries, not one of these blizzard things that was going on outside.

Speaking of traffic, today we set a new record (and it’s only 7:35): THIRTY UNIQUE VISITORS IN ONE DAY AND COUNTING! Yay!!! That includes one Japanese viewer, one Austrailian viewer, a Brazilian viewer, a Canadian viewer, and a viewer from Reykjavík, Iceland (boo ya!). Plus all you American people (Two of which accessed the blog through educational computers – in other words at school. Bad kids…). This stat tracker thing I have really gives a lot of information. Here’s some other stats no one cares about: It predicts that I’ll have 33.7 unique viewers by the end of today, 662 by the end of the month, and 3984 by the end of the year. The average viewer spends 2 minutes and 48 seconds at my website. The top referrer (link used to get) to my website is Thomas’ blog, followed closely by my profile. And just a couple even more stupid things: 44.56% of viewers have a 1024×768 screen resolution, 3.85% of viewers use Linux to access my site, and 2.25% of viewers still use 256 colors as their color depth. Losers.

Now if I get so much traffic (over 600 more hits than anyone else and the lead is growing), then why do I get no comments? Abe can title a blog “No-Post” and get more comments than I can. Kelsie and Rachel get 234 comments per post (of course they don’t post often). I on the other hand have to beg people to get even one comment.

Nathan suggested that he gets comments because he’s controversial, Abe gets comments because he’s smart, Thomas gets comments because of his good writing style, and I don’t get comments cause all I do is be funny. Perhaps he has a point? Therefore, I’m going to do a little test – I’m going to copy the styles of these three and see how many comments this post gets.

ABE (intellectualy driven fiction): On Muya Muya’s first day of school in the United States, the morning’s chatter at Schenley High School had turned to din around him. Classmates in his English as a Second Language class, their desks jostled to face one another, laughed about how, under the influence of the monsoon, and further because of the complicated topography, the climate in Vietnam always changes in one year, between the years, or between the areas from North to South and from low to high. The imagery set a relentlessly smog and depressing tone.

THOMAS (deep thoughts expressed in an elevated style): But the dread of something after death, the undiscovered country from whose bourn no traveler that returns, puzzles the will, and makes us bear those ills we have rather than to fly to others that we know not of. Thus conscience does make cowards of us all; and thus the native hue of resolution is sicklied o’er with the pale cast of thought, and enterprises of great pith and moment. With this regard their currents turn awry, and lose the name of action.

NATHAN: (combination of sucking up to girls and controversy): The emotional, sexual, and psychological stereotyping of females begins when the doctor says, “It’s a girl.” This must be put to an end. Women are the only oppressed group in our society that lives in intimate association with their opressors. The thing is, women’s chains have been forged by men, not by anatomy. Guys, it’s time to stop treating women like doormats.

Oh yeah. Time to watch those comments roll in.

9 thoughts on “Random Ramblings (With Abe, Thomas, and Nathan)

  1. i feel like i have so much to live up to now. Your impression of Nathan was definitely the best, Abe’s was really funny, the rambling sentence structure, i hope he isn’t offended, i’m not sure how i feel about mine…i might have to work on more deep thoughts :). Later bud, we need to hang out.

  2. this is called pity…and of course freelance was good today so heres your comment. with complementary anysis of comment and its origins
    comment(noun)kom-ent1. a.A written note intended as an explanation, illustration, or criticism of a passage in a book or other writing; an annotation.b. A series of annotations or explanations.2. a. A statement of fact or opinion, especially a remark that expresses a personal reaction or attitude.b. An implied conclusion or judgment: a novel that is a comment on contemporary lawlessness. 3. Talk; gossip: a divorce that caused much comment. 4. Computer Science. A string of text in a program that does not function in the program itself but is used by the programmer to explain instructions.5. Linguistics. The part of a sentence that provides new information about the topic. Also called rheme.v. com·ment·ed, com·ment·ing, com·ments v. intr.1. To make a comment; remark.2. To serve as a judgmental commentary: “Her demise comments on [the Upper East Side’s] entire way of life” (Mark Muro). v. tr.To make comments on; annotate. [Middle English, from Late Latin commentum, interpretation, from Latin, contrivance, from neuter past participle of commin sc , to devise. See men-1 in Indo-European Roots.] Synonyms: comment, observation, remark These nouns denote an expression of fact, opinion, or explanation: made an unpleasant comment about my friend; a casual observation about the movie; an offensive personal remark.

  3. Well done sir,
    Its not everyday that i get parodied in front of hundreds of people. I just write what i feel and you know what, some times i feel that girls need to be acknowlegded. It was really funny though. Just keep in mind that my vengeance will be swift

  4. -in response to your cry for comments-

    Hey ansen, that snow on your blog is wicked awesome! How’d you do that? well, i suppose i dont need to know cuz i wont be entirely unoriginal and put it on mine. so anyways, your band is good.


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